If You Could Do Anything…
I once was. I am becoming. I chose the name for my blog two years ago, and it still resonates. In one week from today, yet another chapter will close as I complete all of my requirements of a 6 month training to become a 200hr RYT (Registered Yoga Teacher). I mean, WHAT?? Me. A yoga teacher…I just can’t believe it. As the final round of homework is turned in, my last mandatory classes are attended, my practice teachings come to a close, the exam draws near…as each item gets ticked off the list, I find that I am, in amazement, watching myself complete this thing I once thought was an impossibility.
You know the question, “If you could do anything and you knew you would succeed, what would you do?” It’s such a beautiful question, right? It was anything but beautiful for me, for so long. This question used to drum up so much anxiety and fear and stress for me. I HATED it. Could not stand it. It was an immediate off switch, a direct path to emotional shut down. I remember a time when dreaming about being more than a wife/mom/assistant/etc., or dreaming about anything really, seemed so far out of the realm of possibility, the thought might as well have lived in one of the other trillion universes, far far far away from my reality.
I think this resistance to potential, to possibility, came from trauma, from conditioning, from being worn down, from the unconscious belief that I only have the capacity to survive this life. But things are changing, as they do And as I get back to writing more, I’m so excited to share more about what’s been changing for me and the gift yoga has been…the gift it’s been to be in my body, to rest above my frenetic mind, to know and love exactly where I am today, to trust my intuition and the truths I’ve learned in my own unique experience…just so many things. I am amazed at my quality of life over the last 6 months as I’ve navigated the busyness of training, work, home, family, friends, etc. It would have been enough to take me under…but it didn’t. I more than survived.
Right now, I’m smiling, thinking about all the amazing accomplishments people have made, and how this could seem like small potatoes to some. But not to me, man. This is a huge fucking deal. I’m so proud of myself. It’s so much bigger than 6 months, so much bigger than a title, so much bigger than a pat on the back for hard work, it’s a major shift in perspective…
How cool is that?? And this is just another marker, another timestamp to look back to in times of uncertainty and anxiousness about whatever new thing I’m doing. So, one day, when I’m in the process of writing my book and my mind starts telling me, “You’re not a writer,” I can look back and say, “Well, at one time, I wasn’t a yoga teacher either.”
So, an encouragement for you today. Your world, perspective, and knowings have the potential for expansion all the time, if you allow them. Your reality today does not have to be your reality tomorrow. Try to love and appreciate exactly where you are today, knowing that the landscape of your unfolding may be larger than you’re able to see or comprehend right now. And, you’re doing a fucking fantastic job!